Jim Varney stars in his third movie about Ernest P. Worrall, and also plays a second role as Felix Nash, a cold-blooded murderer and prison "boss". Ernest serves on the jury for Nash's murder trial, but Nash arranges for look-alike Ernest to go to jail, while he is free to plan a bank robbery where Ernest works.
The switch starts in court, when Felix Nash convinces the jury to tour the prison. Ernest is kidnapped and forced to swap roles with Nash. He has misadventures in the slammer, imitates famous actors at a mirror, tries to escape, then is sent by the prison warden (Charles Napier) to the electric chair.
Ernest: "Death row? You mean like the chair, the hot seat, dead meat, deep 6, it's over pal, you're outta here bub, the groundhogs are bringing you your mail, you're picking turnips with a step ladder, the no tomorrow row? That kind of row? Oh no. The row?"
(Ernest as Auntie Nelda)
Aunt Nelda: "Young Man, Would you please open that gate, I left my car running outside?"
Gate Guard: "Ma'am, You tell me how you got through this gate, the visitors area's on the other side of the prison."
Aunt Nelda: "I brought him up with the best I could, but sometimes a bad thief pulls from even the most fragile flower."
Gate Guard: "Ma'am, you are not going through this gate."
Aunt Nelda: "Is this the way you'd treat your mother? Is this the kind of abuse that poor woman must endure?"
Gate Guard: "Well, I guess that my mother is a little bit mad."
Aunt Nelda: "Mmmhmm! You ought to be in the slammer with the rest of these misfits. If you had any remorse at all for the horror you pushed your mother through, you'd open that gate. I have a car overheating as we speak."
(Ernest makes a snooty expression at the Gate Guard)
Gate Guard: "OK, OK."
(picks up phone)
Gate Guard: "All right! Let's open the east gate."
(hangs up)
Gate Guard: "There. Now you satisfied?"
Aunt Nelda: "Now tell your mother how her son has improved the spited shaded in somewhat chicken pass."
Ernest accepts his fate: "So it's come to this. A pointless, miserable end to a shallow, meaningless life. But it's as it should be. It's the hand I've been dealt, and I have to play it as it lays. Oh, I'm not going to cry because life's thrown me a curve. I'm not going to whine because I got mashed potatoes when French fries is what I really wanted. It's time for me to step up to the plate, belly up to the bar! It's time for me to look fate square in the eye, flare my nostrils, breathe life's last breath. It's time for me to lie down with lions so I can soar with the eagles. All right! I'm ready! Come and get me. Let's do it!"
Guard: "Would you like a cigarette or a blindfold or something?"
Ernest: "No, I'm afraid of the dark, and cigarettes will kill you."
But the execution fails, and Ernest is turned into a superhuman with the ability to shoot lightning bolts from his hands. Calling himself "Electro Man", he escapes from prison, returns home, and is shocked that his weirdly furnished place has been re-decorated in a lounge lizard style. He says, "I've been vandalized--by Elvis!"
Ernest goes to the bank where he is the janitor and finds Nash robbing the bank. He uses his super powers to fly through the skylight with a bomb Nash had attached to the vault. There is a tremendous explosion and everyone assumes Ernest is dead, until he falls from the skylight onto Nash and says, "I came! I saw! I got blowed up!"
Ernest: "Did you hear the one about the three legged dog that walked into a bar and said, 'I'm lookin' for the guy that shot my paw.'"
(finds his dog Rimshot in the trashcan) "What kind of person would throw away a perfectly good dog?"
"Real men are not intimidated by physical threats against their personal selves, and, ironically, neither am I."
Also in the cast are: Gailard Sartain (Chuck), Bill Byrge (Bobby), Barbara Tyson (Charlotte Sparrow), Barry Scott (Rubin Bartlett), Randall Cobb (Lyle), Dan Leegant (Oscar Pendlesmythe), Jim Conrad (Eddie), Jackie Welch (Judge), Melanie Wheeler (Prosecutor), Buck Ford (Defense Attorney), Daniel Butler (waiter), Myke R. Mueller (Vinnie), Barkley (Rimshot), and many others. Charlie Cohen wrote the script. Music is by Bruce Arntson and Kirby Shelstad. John R. Cherry III directed.
Jim Varney (1949-2000) made the bumbling and goofy Ernest character famous in many TV commercials before making movies. ERNEST GOES TO JAIL is a Disney production and contains no offensive language and Ernest plays multiple characters. It is cute, mindless, with some good slapstick and Ernest's usual child-like mugging and leering. This brainless screwball comedy has a good script and direction, and is silly, corny, cheesy, original, innocent, and wholesome fun. It's the second most successful Ernest movie, after ERNEST SAVES CHRISTMAS (1988), and it grossed over $25,000,000. The film is considered by his fans and detractors as his very best.
