The Hilarious House of Frightenstein (1971) * * ½

THE HILARIOUS HOUSE OF FRIGHTENSTIEIN was a 1971 Canadian TV series produced by independent station CHCH in 1971, located in Hamilton, Ontario. It was syndicated to television stations across Canada and the US and sometimes appears in some TV markets today. This 48 minute show was a fixture on Saturday morning television for decades. Through its combination of variety, humor, and educational segments, all flavored with the spice of mock horror, the show had a lasting impact on the youth of the day. Each episode opened and closed with an appearance by horror star Vincent Price as he recited poetry with toy skulls and shrunken heads in the background. Price also did introductions for segments within the show.

A quirky sketch comedy series, the show's cast included Billy Van, Fishka Rais, Guy Big, Mitch Markowitz, Vincent Price and Julius Sumner Miller. Billy Van played most of the characters. All 130 episodes of the series were made in a single 9 month period starting in 1971, and the scenes with Vincent Price and Julius Miller were all filmed during one summer.

The titular character, Count Frightenstein, was the thirteenth son of Count Dracula and was exiled to Castle Frightenstein in Frankenstone, Canada for failing to revive Brucie J. Monster, a Frankenstein-like monster. Assisted by Igor (Fishka Rais), an overweight incompetent, and a three-foot-tall mini-Count (Guy Big), each episode followed the Count’s efforts to revive Brucie and featured comedy skits. His favorite line is, "Yes, I am the Count. You can count on it." Billy Van played Count Frightenstein.

Vincent Price reads morbid poetry on the show. About 400 bits were shot with him over a 4 day session. He accepted the gig because he loved kids and saw the innovation in this vehicle. He allegedly worked for around $13,000 in total when that was commonly his daily appearance rate. He would read the script to himself, put his head down for a few seconds and do a single take read on-camera. "Next!" At one point the crew was exhausted by his pace and he suddenly disappeared. Everyone thought he must have gone to collapse somewhere. But he had hailed a cab, gone to the local beer store and brought a couple of two-fours into the station. Everybody sat cross-legged in the studio and listened to his stories of Hollywood and Cecil B. DeMille. The next break they took, he had his picture taken with each crew member in the make-up room. One of the guys blew them up to 8x10’s that night and he wrote a personal note to each person on the show.

(opening Poem)
"Another lovely day begins, for ghosts and ghouls with greenish skin. So close your eyes, and you will find that you've arrived in Frightenstein. Perhaps the Count will find a way to make his monster work today. For if he solves this monster-mania, he can return to Transylvania. So welcome where the sun won't shine, to the castle of Count Frightenstein!"

"Some of Bwana’s animals decided they would go
Into the town and have some lunch, and maybe see a show
They went into the restaurant, the lion took a look
He saw the waiter, ate him raw, and kindly thanked the cook
And when they got the bill they did not know what they should do
So the lion called the cashier in, and then he ate him too!"

(closing Poem)
"The castle lights are growing dim. There's no one left but me...and him. When next we meet in Frankenstone--don't come alone."

Igor is Count Frightestein's overweight incompetent slave. Fishka Rais, who played the character was an accomplished jazz singer from South Africa. Rais died in 1974, shortly after an unsuccessful surgical operation to help his obesity problem.

The Wolfman is a werewolf DJ at radio station EECH who plays rock and roll records while doing a Wolfman Jack impression. His theme song is Sly and the Family Stone's "I Want to Take You Higher". The segment featured then-current hit singles by the Rolling Stones or Sly and the Family Stone, which were referred to as "golden oldies" in order to avoid dating the program. Igor and the Wolfman dance in silhouette against a psychedelic background. Due to licensing issues, the musical numbers are no longer shown on reruns. Billy Van played the Wolfman.

The Professor was played by U.S. physicist Professor Julius Sumner Miller, a veteran of the Mickey Mouse Club, where he was known as Professor Wonderful. He provides science lessons on such things as thermal expansion and the cartesian diver.

The Grammar Slammer is the disembodied voice who challenged Igor to correct grammatical errors. He was accompanied by an 8 foot purple puppet monster the Grammar Slammer Bammer who threatened to beat up Igor if he failed. The character was played by Joe Torbay.

Bwana Clyde Batty is a British explorer who teaches about wild animals on Zany Zoo and whose name is a spoof of animal trainer Clyde Beatty. His catchphrase is "Ooga Booga!" Billy Van played Batty.

Grizelda, the Ghastly Gourmet is a witch who cooks suitably ghastly recipes in her cauldron. It's a spoof of TV cooking hosts, basically a parody of THE GALLOPING GOURMET, which was very popular at the time. In every one of her segments, she bangs her head on the pot above her cauldron, and invariably declares the recipe a failure after it causes a small explosion. The iron cauldron was a real one borrowed from a tiny farm museum north of Toronto. It was set up with dry ice for the boiling effect. Grizelda was very vain, often comparing her "beauty" to famous women, including Goldie Hawn. Billy Van played Griselda, and her make-up took hours to put on, and Van would work long hours to make the most of the make-up every shooting day. As the day wore on into night Van became increasingly punchy providing hours of out-take laughs for the crew at the CHCH studio.

The Librarian is an elderly curmudgeon who unsuccessfully tries to scare the viewers by reading children's stories, such as "Humpty Dumpty" and "Henny Penny", which he thinks are horror stories. He also sometimes reads fables with unpleasant endings. He eventually admits to not being any more frightened than the viewers, but considers reading important nonetheless. He would occasionally hit on a stuffed golden eagle perched near his chair. Billy Van played the Librarian.

The Maharishi is a Hindu guru who shares bits of mystically inscrutable wisdom. A large bag of flowers would then fall atop his head afterward. Billy Van played the Maharishi.

The Oracle is a mystic who reads out horoscopes in a Peter Lorre voice, invariably knocking over and breaking his crystal ball in the process. He then answers questions supposedly sent in from viewers. Billy Van played the Oracle.

Dr. Pet Vet is a veterinarian who teaches about domestic animals, whereas the Zany Zoo was about wild fauna. He always offers the day's animal to Igor as a pet, but the Sloth in the basement invariably refuses to allow Igor to keep the animal. Billy Van played Dr. Pet Vet.

The Midget Count was played by Guy Big as a Mini-Me type 3 foot tall clone of the Count. Guy was originally slated to play the main role as the Count but his speaking voice would not hold out for more than a few hours. Billy Van was playing his part in Party Game, another of Markowitz's shows, and he was called in to audition for the role of the Count and was hired for the lead role where his various talents were more fully revealed.

Super Hippy was played by Mitchell Markowitz, Rafeal Markowitz's younger brother. This hippie in a superhero costume appears leading in and out of commercials, sitting or flying in varying locations as he delivers some variation on "Don't change the channel, we'll be right back after these commercials."

The Singing Soldier is a palace guard who gets a cream pie thrown in his face whenever he sings. Billy Van played the Singing Soldier.

The Mosquito always tells a bad joke about insects before biting a human foot. The character was played by Mitchell Markowitz, the producer's younger brother

The Gorilla is a person in a gorilla costume who walks out of a jungle set and invariably tries to scare whomever he is looking at. In every segment however he is thwarted by a golf ball that hits him in the head, causing him to keel over. He often tries to avoid the golf balls, in one case by holding up a parasol. The Gorilla was played by Paul Shultz who also worked in the prop department. Sometimes Billy Van played the Gorilla.

Puppets (by Joe Torbay) included: Harvey Wallbanger the postmaster of Castle Frightenstein's "dead letter office". This puppet appears in sketches with The Count or Grizelda in which they answer letters. Gronk is a purple sea serpent who interacts with the Count or the Wolfman.

Both the opening and closing credits were accompanied by a musical composition played entirely on a Moog synthesizer and written by Harry Breuer, Gary Carol and Pat Prilly. Its title is "March of the Martians". The recording can be found on an out-of-print Pickwick vinyl album called "The Happy Moog".

Production of the show lasted approximately 9 to 12 months, depending on who you ask. It was shot completely out of sequence, and all segments were shot together. So, Billy Van spent a few weeks as Grizelda, a few weeks as the Librarian, even a few days as the ape getting hit in the head with baseballs. This explains why there are no running themes throughout any of the episodes. The shows were then assembled from the bits and pieces and all follow the same basic pattern of sketches. Vincent Price’s involvement was the same as everybody else--a few intense days recording mountains of material.

THE HILARIOUS HOUSE OF FRIGHTENSTIEIN last aired on a Canadian cable station called "Showcase" in 1997. When its run was over, the broadcast masters used by Showcase were allegedly destroyed at the request of the producer. Frightenstein suffered its biggest blow in 2003 with the death of Billy Van. In the words of cameraman Dave Cremasco: "Billy was the show". In 2005, Stacey Case organized a Frightenstein Fest which offered a reunion of cast and crew, merchandise, episode screenings, and the premiere of the documentary RETURN TO TRANSYLVANIA.

Billy Van Evera was born in Toronto in 1934. By age 12, "Billy Van" and his four brothers were touring North America as a singing act, and by the 1960s he was on his way to becoming one of Canada’s best-loved comedians. Van first gained national attention as a fixture on the 1960s CBC TV series NIGHTCAP, a late-night show known for its irreverent satire, low budget and risque humour. A chameleon who flipped effortlessly from character to character, Van’s parodies were wild and brash. He set the prototype for Canadian sketch comedy in the 1970s--broad, over-the-top and painfully accurate. Billy Van beefed up such Yankee Doodle series as The Sonny and Cher Comedy Hour and The Hudson Brothers Razzle Dazzle Show, and starred with Jack Duffy and Dinah Christie on the CHCH series Party Game, but never achieved the fame of Canadian comedians such as John Candy and Dan Aykroyd. In part, this was a result of timing--his comedy was ahead of its time. Van's work on Frightenstein lampooning pop culture (hippies, horror movies and music) foreshadowed the parodies that made SCTV a hit. When Mike Myers was inducted into that other Canadian Walk of Fame, he credited Van, among others, for helping shape his comedy. Billy Van died in 2003 of lung cancer. He was 68. Van’s last screen performance was as "Les" the trainer in the 1995 hockey movie NET WORTH (1995). It was a fitting final role for an actor who performed comedy with heart, passion and a tremendous amount of talent.

On October 18, 2005, Empire Pictures released a single DVD featuring a handful of half-hour US-syndicated episodes. The most significant change for these episodes as broadcast, apart from the length, was the addition of a laugh track. On October 17th, 2006, Alliance Atlantis Home Video in Canada released a 3-disc box set of 13 full-length episodes, with restored Wolfman segments. The shows are not in chronological order, as only episodes that had thus far obtained music clearances for the Wolfman dance segments were included. The Wolfman theme, Sly & the Family Stone's "I Want To Take You Higher", had not yet been cleared--and it is doubtful that it ever will be cleared, since Michael Jackson owns the rights--so the opening was altered with new music by The Tijuana Bibles from Toronto, and Billy Van's voice was re-dubbed by another Toronto voice actor. As per recent airings in Canada on the cable networks Drive-In Classics and Space, the main Frightenstein theme is also a re-recording, due to licencing restrictions by Morning Music, Ltd. "RETURN TO TRANSYLVANIA: A Short Documentary about Billy Van" is a 7 minute biography of Billy Van and the show and included as an extra on some DVDs.

The newer version released in 2006 has the original sparkle and appeal for kids of all ages. It's wonderful to revisit those far-off happy days when children's television was unbounded by political correctness and didn't underestimate the audience. There's no laugh-track and it's as fresh and funny as ever. A second set of 9 episodes will be released by Critical Mass in late 2008. The DVD Lone Wolf owns is very obviously created from old VHS tapes of the show, and therefore the video quality is not the best.

The Big Sleep (1945) * * * ½

Private detective Philip Marlowe (Humphrey Bogart) calls on new client General Sternwood (Charles Waldron) at his LA mansion. As he waits, the General's younger daughter Carmen (Martha Vickers) flirts with Marlowe. Marlowe is indifferent, leaving Carmen intrigued. He is then led by Norris, the butler, into the sun room where he is introduced to the ailing but wealthy general, who wants to resolve gambling debts owed by Carmen to a bookseller named Arthur Gwynn Geiger. As Marlowe begins to leave, he is stopped by General Sternwood's oldest daughter, Mrs. Vivian Rutledge (Lauren Bacall), who questions Marlowe about what he is doing for her father. Vivian, who recently divorced, suspects her father's true reason for calling in a detective is to find Sean Regan, his friend, companion and bodyguard who mysteriously disappeared a month earlier. The general assumption, established as the film progresses, is that Regan has run off with a local gambler's wife, Mrs. Eddie Mars.

General Sternwood: You may smoke, too. I can still enjoy the smell of it. Hum, nice state of affairs when a man has to indulge his vices by proxy. You're looking, sir, at a very dull survival of a very gaudy life, crippled, paralyzed in both legs, barely I eat and my sleep is so near waking it's hardly worth a name. I seem to exist largely on heat like a new born spider. Do you like orchids?
Philip Marlowe: Not particularly.
General Sternwood: Ugh. Nasty things. Their flesh is too much like the flesh of men, and their perfume has the rotten sweetness of corruption.

Vivian: So you're a private detective. I didn't know they existed, except in books, or else they were greasy little men snooping around hotel corridors. My, you're a mess, aren't you?
Philip Marlowe: I'm not very tall either. Next time I'll come on stilts wear a white tie and carry a tennis racket.
Vivian: I doubt if even that will help.
Vivian: What will your first step be?
Philip Marlowe: The usual one.
Vivian: I didn't know there was a usual one.
Philip Marlowe: Well sure there is, it comes complete with diagrams on page 47 of how to be a detective in 10 easy lessons correspondent school textbook and uh, your father offered me a drink.
Vivian: You must've read another one on how to be a comedian.
Philip Marlowe: I collect blondes and bottles.

Marlowe goes to Arthur Geiger's book shop and dons a disguise as he enters the shop under the premise of searching for several rare books. Agnes, the unfriendly shop assistant, claims that they don't have the book Marlowe is looking for, nor any of the other books he asks about. Marlowe begins to suspect that the book store is a front. As he is talking with Agnes, a man enters the back room where Marlowe sees stacks of books and paper. His suspicions are correct: Geiger is illegally selling pornographic books. He asks to see Mr. Geiger, but Agnes claims that Geiger is not in. Marlowe leaves the store and takes shelter in a bookstore across the street as it begins to rain. While there, he asks the clerk whether or not she has ever seen Geiger. She says that she has. She describes Geiger as being in his early 40s, fat, with a Charlie Chan mustache and a glass eye. Marlowe and the attractive brunette begin to flirt. She removes her glasses and lets down her hair. Marlowe decides to wait for Geiger in the store. The clerk lowers the blinds and pulls out glasses for the bottle of rye Marlowe offers.

They wait for Geiger. Marlowe glimpses Geiger leaving his bookshop, says goodbye to the clerk, then follows Geiger to his home. As Marlowe is getting out of his car, a second car pulls up to the front of the house. A woman gets out and runs inside. Marlowe checks the registration on the car that pulled up, it reads "Carmen Sternwood". Marlowe goes back to wait in his car. Time passes. He sees a flash of light, then hears a gunshot and a scream, immediately followed by the getaway of two of the cars parked behind the house. Marlowe enters Geiger's house, where he finds Geiger's dead body on the living room floor. Next to it he finds Carmen, high and wearing an Asian dress, a subtle indication that she had somehow been modeling for Geiger's pornography books. Marlowe looks around the room and finds a statue with a camera hidden inside of it. The camera's film cartridge is empty. Marlowe leaves the scene and returns Carmen to her home, where he tricks Vivian into revealing that Carmen had a connection with Sean Regan.

Marlowe walks back to Geiger's house to retrieve his car. Inside, Geiger's corpse is nowhere to be found. Back in his office, Marlowe receives a phone call from Bernie Ohls, Chief Inspector of Homicide, who works for the District Attorney. Ohls and Marlowe are friends from when Marlowe worked for the DA. Bernie tells Marlowe that a car registered to the Sternwoods has been found off the Lido Pier. After arriving at the scene, Bernie questions Marlowe about his work for the Sternwoods and urges him to let go of the case. They discover that the driver of the car was Owen Taylor, the Sternwoods' chauffer who was in love with Carmen. Owen Taylor has been blackjacked then pushed into the ocean in his car.

The next morning, Vivian comes to Marlowe's office. She has been sent a scandalous picture of Carmen and a blackmail demand for the negatives from Agnes. Vivian says she can get the money from Eddie Mars (John Ridgely). She is supposed to make the drop that evening. She promises to call Marlowe to let him know where the drop will be made. Marlowe returns to Geiger's bookshop, and discovers that they are packing up the store. Marlowe follows the car leaving Geiger's store in a taxi and arrives at the apartment of Joe Brody (Louis Jean Heydt). Joe Brody is a gambler who has previously blackmailed General Sternwood for $5,000.

Marlowe returns to Geiger's house where he finds Carmen attempting to get inside. She initially claims to know little about the murder of Geiger but then claims Brody killed Geiger. They are then surprised by someone unlocking the front door. The man is the owner of the home, who Marlowe realizes is Eddie Mars. Marlowe and Mars have a brief conversation, where Marlowe claims that he is there working for Carmen. The two are looking for Geiger, who he claims gave Carmen "the loop". Mars tries to bully Marlowe into telling him who cleaned out Geiger's store.

Eddie Mars: Convenient, the door being open when you didn't have a key, eh?
Philip Marlowe: Yeah, wasn't it. By the way, how'd you happen to have one?
Eddie Mars: Is that any of your business?
Philip Marlowe: I could make it my business.
Eddie Mars: I could make your business mine.
Philip Marlowe: Oh, you wouldn't like it. The pay's too small. Oh, Eddie, you don't have anybody watching me, do you? Tailing me in a gray Plymouth coupe, maybe?
Eddie Mars: No, why should I?
Philip Marlowe: Well, I can't imagine, unless you're worried about where I am all the time.
Eddie Mars: I don't like you that well.

In the evening, Vivian calls to say that she hasn't heard anything from the blackmailer. On a hunch, Marlowe drives to Joe Brody's apartment and waits outside. Vivian drives up and enters the apartment. Marlowe uses his knowledge of Geiger to force his way in. Joe Brody, Agnes (Geiger's assistant) and Vivian are inside. Marlowe accuses Joe Brody of murdering Owen Taylor for the photos. He also says that Brody can be framed for Geiger's killing. Marlowe demands the film. The door buzzes and Brody opens it to be greeted at gunpoint by Carmen, who has come for her pictures. Marlowe takes the film from Brody and sends Vivian and Carmen home. After the women leave, Brody admits he was blackmailing both Colonel Sternwood and Vivian. He claims innocence for both murders, however. Joe Brody says that he was waiting in his car in back of Geiger's house the night that Geiger was shot, but that there was another car down the hill, presumably Owen Taylor. Brody confesses to taking the film off of Owen Taylor and blackjacking him.

There is another knock at the door and, as Brody opens it, he is shot and killed. The murderer runs down the stairs to escape. Marlowe follows and apprehends him, only to find that he is Carol Lundgren, Geiger's "shadow", who has killed Brody in revenge, falsely believing that Brody was Geiger's killer. Marlowe brings Lundgren back to Geiger's house. Marlowe ties up Lundgren and calls Detective Bernie Ohls to come pick him up. With Geiger's murder attributed to Owen Taylor, Owen Taylor's likely killer (Brody) now dead himself, and Lundgren turned in to the police for the Brody killing, Vivian Sternwood is anxious for Marlowe to close the case. Marlowe, however, is worried about a number of unanswered questions revolving around Eddie Mars and Regan. He refuses to be "sugared off" the case. Their conversation is highly sexually charged, exposing a romantic tension that has been building throughout the film.

Marlowe visits Mars' casino, where he finds Vivian singing. He asks Mars about Regan, who is supposed to have run off with Mars' wife, but Mars is evasive. He tells Marlowe that Vivian is leaving bad IOUs in his casino. Vivian wins a large amount of money at the tables and wants Marlowe to drive her home. He waits in his car for her, then foils Mars' thugs attempting to rob Vivian of her winnings. But Marlowe realizes the attempted robbery was faked and presses Vivian on her association with Mars. As he unsuccessfully questions her, they kiss.

When he returns home, Carmen is waiting for him. He asks her about Regan and she admits she didn't like him. She also mentions that Mars calls Vivian frequently. In the morning, Detective Bernie Ohls calls Marlowe and tells him to lay off the Sternwood case. Marlowe suspects the key to the mystery is Mars and Regan and persuades Ohls to back off. Marlowe then calls the Sternwood mansion and Vivian tells him Regan has been found in Mexico.

Marlowe is then brutally beaten by two of Mars' thugs, who tell him to lay off the case. He is helped by Harry Jones (Elisha Cook, Jr.), an associate of Brody's. Jones conveys an offer from Agnes to reveal the location of Mars' wife for $200. However, when Marlowe goes to meet him, Canino, a hired killer of Mars', has gotten there first. He gets Agnes' location from Jones before poisoning him. It turns out to have been a false location. When Agnes tries to call Jones, Marlowe arranges a meeting with her. Agnes tells Marlowe that she's seen Eddie Mars' wife near Realito by a "car drop" called Art Huck's Car Repair. This is a location where Eddie Mars repaints stolen cars.

Philip Marlowe: You the guy that's been tailing me?
Harry Jones: Yeah, the name's Jones. Harry Jones. I want to see you.
Philip Marlowe: Swell. Did you want to see those guys jump me?
Harry Jones: I didn't care one way or the other.
Philip Marlowe: You could've yelled for help.
Harry Jones: If a guy's playing a hand, I let him play it. I'm no kibitzer.
Philip Marlowe: You got brains.

Marlowe follows Agnes' tip and fakes a flat tire to gain entry to the Art Huck's Car Repair shop. But he is attacked and knocked out by Canino. He wakes to find himself locked up with Mars' wife, who has no idea where Regan is. Vivian is also hiding there. Mona Mars believes her husband is innocent of any killings and leaves when Marlowe tells her about Jones' death. Vivian, fearing for his life, kisses and frees Marlowe. When Canino arrives, Marlowe gets to his car and his gun. He eventually is able to kill Canino with Vivian's help.

Vivian and Marlowe drive back to Geiger's bungalow. She asks, "What if I told you I killed Sean Regan?", but Marlowe does not believe her. When they arrive at Geiger's house, Marlowe calls Eddie Mars. Marlowe says that he is still in Realito at the payphone. They arrange to meet at Geiger's house, giving Marlowe 10 minutes at the house before Mars will arrive. Marlowe says, "Mars has been ahead of me all the way, if I don't get him this time, we're cooked." When Mars arrives to set up an ambush, Marlowe surprises him and holds him at gunpoint. Mars admits that it was Carmen that killed Regan after being spurned. Mars covered it up but was blackmailing Vivian.

Marlowe wounds Mars and he runs out. But his men, waiting to ambush Marlowe, shoot and kill Mars. Marlowe calls Bernie Ohls to wrap up the case but tells him that Mars killed Regan. Marlowe and Vivian decide to commit Carmen and conceal the truth from the dying General Sternwood. They wait in the dark as sirens approach, now committed to each other.

THE BIG SLEEP is a perfect example of the film noir genre. Humphrey Bogart and Lauren Bacall made screen history together more than once, but they were never more popular than in this adaptation of Raymond Chandler's novel, directed by Howard Hawks. The story is so complicated that even Chandler had trouble following his own plot. It requires the viewer to keep track of an unexpected number of characters--including two characters who never appear on screen, a pivotal character who doesn't actually have any lines, and a character who is frequently mentioned but doesn't appear until near the film's conclusion. One of the mysteries is never solved in the movie, but most viewers don't seem to care. However, the film is a certified classic, very entertaining and atmospheric, and an electrifying plunge into detective fiction. An absolutely mesmerizing film, it is a masterpiece full of sharp dialogue that moves at a brisk pace, the finest detective novel ever put on celluloid. The whole thing is filmed as a fast moving dream of dialogue and images hard to forget. One critic likened it to a huge hangover.

There are two cuts of this movie: the 1946 movie star version and the 1945 film noir version. THE BIG SLEEP is noted for its convoluted plot. During filming neither the director nor the screenwriters knew who killed chauffeur Owen Taylor or if he had killed himself. They sent a cable to Chandler who wrote to a friend in a letter: "They sent me a wire... asking me, and dammit I didn't know either". It is also interesting to watch the 1945 version of the film--as well as the documentary prepared by UCLA which details the differences between the two--all changes wrought by the strengthening of the Bacall character to leverage the chemistry between her and Bogart. The scene in the book store was also quite a display of chemistry between Bogart and Dorothy Malone. Novelist Raymond Chandler said Martha Vickers (Carmen) overshadowed Lauren Bacall (Vivian) in their scenes together, which led the producers to delete much of Vickers' performance to enhance Bacall's.

This movie was made in the age of Hays Office censorship, when it was expected that adults would understand certain story points that would be lost to children. In the novel, the books Geiger profitably rents are pornography, then illegal and associated with organized crime. In the film, Joe Brody is killed by Carol Lundgren who believes he killed Geiger. In the novel, Lundgren is Geiger's homosexual lover, a detail which goes unmentioned in the film. Also in the novel, Marlowe finds pornographic photographs of Carmen and later finds her naked in his bed. In the film, the photographs show Carmen was at Geiger's house when he was killed (thus possibly implicating her in his murder). The novel's nude bedroom scene in Marlowe's apartment is altered in the film to a clothed Carmen awaiting him in an armchair.

Film critic Roger Ebert, who entered the film in his list of 100 Great Movies, praises the film's writing: "Working from Chandler's original words and adding spins of their own, the writers wrote one of the most quotable of screenplays: It's unusual to find yourself laughing in a movie not because something is funny but because it's so wickedly clever." The Washington Post called the film "an unqualified masterpiece."

The cast also includes: Martha Vickers (Carmen Sternwood), Dorothy Malone (Acme Bookstore proprietress), Peggy Knudsen (Mona Mars), Regis Toomey (Chief Insp. Bernie Ohls of the District Attorney's Office). Charles Waldron (Gen. Sternwood), Charles D. Brown (Norris), Bob Steele (Lash Canino), Louis Jean Heydt (Joe Brody), Pat Clark (Mona Mars), James Flavin (Capt. Cronjager), Thomas E. Jackson (Dist. Atty. White), Trevor Bardette (Art Huck), Joy Barlow (Taxi driver), Max Barwyn (Max), Deannie Best (Waitress), Tanis Chandler (Waitress), Jack Chefe (Croupier), Joseph Crehan ("Doc" the Medical Examiner), Sonia Darrin (Agnes Lowzier), Carole Douglas (Librarian at Hollywood Public Library), Jay Eaton (Extra in casino), Tom Fadden (Sidney), Bess Flowers, Shep Houghton (Nightclub patron), Pete Kooy (Motorcycle offcer), Lorraine Miller (Hatcheck girl), Forbes Murray (Furtive man), Shelby Payne (Cigarette girl), Jack Perry, Tommy Rafferty (Carol Lundgren), Emmett Vogan (Ed), Theodore von Eltz (Arthur Gwynn Geiger), Wally Walker (Mars' thug), Dan Wallace (Owen Taylor), Paul Weber (Mars' thug), and Ben Welden (Pete). Max Steiner composed the original music. William Faulkner, Leigh Brackett, and Jules Furthman wrote the screenplay from Raymond Chandler's 1939 novel "The Big Sleep". Howard Hawks directed.

The authorised DVD is a double-sided, single-layer disc, with the 1946 movie star version on side A as it was released to theaters, and the 1945 film noir version as it was originally shot on side B. The actual differences between the two are fairly slight, but they prove significant. The 1946 version shows Bogart (as Philip Marlowe) as the epitome of "cool" in every situation, even when he has a gun pulled on him or is getting beaten up. Lauren Bacall comes off much better in the 1946 version as well, as she shows the spark that was seen in TO HAVE AND HAVE NOT (1944). The 1945 version has a few scenes cut from the 1946 version which are quite good, and is actually a little easier to understand.

Although the original version is somewhat easier to follow in terms of story, it lacks the flash that makes the theatrical version such a memorable experience. It is easy to see why Hawks chose to rescript and reshoot several key scenes as well as add new ones, and fans will have fun comparing the two. The DVD also includes a documentary on the differences between the films and the motivations behind them. Picture and sound quality are quite good, but some reviewers have noted portions of this print have a flicker or seem a bit washed out, but they do not distract from the enjoyment of this movie. In 1997 the U.S. Library of Congress deemed this film "culturally, historically, or aesthetically significant" and preserved to the National Film Registry.

The Golden Voyage of Sinbad (1974) * * *

Sinbad (John Phillip Law) while sailing comes across a golden tablet dropped by a mysterious flying creature. He wears the tablet as an amulet around his neck. That night, Sinbad has a strange dream in which he sees a man dressed in black, repeatedly calling his name. He also sees a mysterious girl with an eye tattooed on her right palm. The next day, a mysterious force brings his ship to a coastal town in the country of Marabia.

Sinbad encounters the Grand Vizier of Marabia (Douglas Wilmer) outside his palace. The Vizier, who wears a golden mask to hide his disfigured face, says that Sinbad's amulet is actually one piece of a puzzle, and the Vizier has another. He tells Sinbad about a legend that the three pieces, when joined together, will reveal a map showing the way to the Fountain of Destiny, hidden somewhere on the lost continent of Lemuria. The legend tells that he who bears the three pieces of the puzzle to the fountain will receive "youth, a shield of darkness, and a crown of untold riches."

Sinbad: Trust in Allah, but tie up your camel.

Sinbad agrees to help the Vizier find the fountain. They join forces against Koura (Tom Baker), an evil magician who wishes to conquer Marabia. Koura had locked the Vizier in a room and set it on fire, horribly burning his face. The creature that dropped the gold tablet was one of Koura's minions, a homunculus created by his black magic. Koura wants Sinbad's golden talisman to complete the spell.

Vizier: The more I study it, the greater the puzzle becomes.
Koura: He who is patient obtains.

Before leaving Morabia, Sinbad picks up two passengers for the journey. The first is Haroun (Kurt Christian), the shiftless hashish-addict son of a local slave merchant. His father wants to build the boy's character, and he thinks a few years on a sea voyage will do the trick. The merchant also throws in a slave named Margiana (Caroline Munro) to sweeten the deal. Margiana catches Sinbad's eye because of an eye-shaped tattoo she has on her palm, and he had a prophetic dream of the tattoo. However, Margiana never plays any vital part in the adventure, so Sinbad's dream was essentially fulfilling the role of a dating service. She, Haroun, and the Vizier board Sinbad's ship. Koura hires a ship and crew of his own and follows Sinbad, using his magic several times to try to stop Sinbad. However, each attempt drains away part of his life force and he ages noticeably each time.

Haroun: (wakes up) Are you a merchant? How long will we be gone for, a week?
(Sinbad raises his eyebrows)
Haroun: Two weeks? Three weeks? A month?
(Sinbad raises his eyebrows again)
Haroun: More than a month! How long?
Sinbad: Two or three years.
Haroun: Two or three years! That's horrible.
(the men laugh)
Haroun: We'll be ancient.
(the men laugh again)
Sinbad: Fill your heart with courage!
Haroun: My heart is filled with courage, but I have cowardly legs.
Sinbad: You pace the deck like a caged beast. For one who enjoys the hashish you should be more at peace.

Along his journey, Sinbad fights the wooden figurehead from his own ship, a six-armed Kali idol brandishing a sword in each hand, (both animated by Koura's magic) and an enraged one-eyed Cyclops centaur, against whom a winged griffin also fights. The undisputed highlight of the film is the swordfight between Kali and Sinbad with his sailors. Once they reach the fountain, Koura obtains all the pieces, assembles the puzzle, and drops it in the fountain. His health is restored and he becomes invisible: the "cloak of darkness". However, he is slain in a sword duel by Sinbad, who then takes the "crown of untold riches" that rises out of the fountain and gives it to the Grand Vizier. Sinbad explains to Margiana that he values freedom more, and a king is never really free. The crown's magic powers causes the Vizer's mask to dissolve to reveal his healed face.

The second of special-effects wizard Ray Harryhausen's three Sinbad epics has a plot that sends Sinbad and his crew on a quest for a valuable and magical golden tablet. It follows THE 7th VOYAGE OF SINBAD (1958) and was followed by SINBAD AND THE EYE OF THE TIGER (1979). Harryhausen's "Dynamation" highlights include a six-armed statue, a one-eyed centaur and a flying griffin. This Arabian fantasy shares only the title character in a new story. Although it has less stop-motion animation monsters than some of the other Harryhausen fantasy films, such as CLASH OF THE TITANS (1981), JASON AND THE ARGONAUTS (1963), and MYSTERIOUS ISLAND (1961), this is one of the best. In most Harryhausen films the plot is merely something to be tolerated between animated sequences, but GOLDEN VOYAGE is entertaining throughout.

This entry in the Sinbad franchise is as good as THE 7th VOYAGE OF SINBAD and better than SINBAD AND THE EYE OF THE TIGER. Production values are quite good, and the set design, especially the scenes inside the cavern, is striking and inventive. But the story drags a bit at times, and Law's indeterminate accent sometimes wavers toward strange inflections. The action segments, though they're fewer and farther between than in other Sinbad films, redeem the movie with Harryhausen's incredible artistry. This is a rich, well-crafted fantasy movie the entire family can enjoy.

The cast also includes: Martin Shaw (Rachid), Grégoire Aslan (Hakim), Takis Emmanuel (Achmed), David Garfield (Abdul), Ferdinando Poggi (Kali stand-in), Aldo Sambrell (Omar), Robert Rietty (voices of Haroun / Omar / Koura's Ship Captain), and Robert Shaw (The Oracle of all knowledge). Miklós Rózsa composed the original music. Brian Clemens wrote the screenplay from a story by him and Ray Harryhausen. Gordon Hessler directed.

Columbia's DVD of THE GOLDEN VOYAGE OF SINBAD includes both a full-screen and widescreen version on opposite sides of the disc. The widescreen version is letterboxed at 1.85:1, cropping a small amount of extraneous picture information off the top and bottom of the image. Both versions look very good with solid mono soundtracks in English and Portuguese, along with subtitles in English, Spanish, Portuguese, Chinese, Korean, and Thai. The extras are led by three short featurettes (less than 10 minutes each) focusing on other Harryhausen films: MYSTERIOUS ISLAND (1961), THE 3 WORLDS OF GULLIVER (1960), and EARTH VS. THE FLYING SAUCERS (1956). No trailers for those films, but the trailer for GOLDEN VOYAGE is included, along with a colorful gallery of advertising artwork for the movie and short bios of Ray Harryhausen, director Gordon Hessler, and John Phillip Law.

The Big Broadcast of 1938 (1938) * * *

The new ocean liner S.S. Gigantic is about to race its rival, the S.S. Colossal. Gigantic owner T. Frothingill Bellows (W.C. Fields) sends his brother S.B. (W.C. Fields) on the Colossal, hoping he will cause trouble and help the Gigantic win the race. Delayed by a golf game, S.B. lands on the Gigantic instead. The ship makes a detour to rescue the passengers of a sinking boat which includes S.B.'s unlucky and cursed daughter Martha (Martha Raye). Meanwhile, gambling emcee Buzz Fielding (Bob Hope) is on board to host a radio broadcast aboard the new ship that is racing the ship that holds the current crossing record. He is also trying to escape from his three ex-wives with his fiancée Dorothy Windham (Dorothy Lamour). His job is to announce a series of musical acts, and he desperately tries to juggle Dorothy and his ex-wives who've come for the ride.

S.B. Bellows: (referring to Martha, who has just been rescued) Throw her back in, let the sharks protect themselves!
First reporter: Say, do you know anything about electricity?
S.B. Bellows: My father occupied the chair of applied electricity at State Prison.

The almost nonexistent story line involves a race between two oversized luxury liners. The Gigantic looks like an art deco yacht on steroids. S.B. Bellows, whose reputation for misadventures dates back to the sinking of the Merrimac, winds up on the Gigantic where disaster immediately strikes. On the way, the crew picks up his daughter, the even unluckier Martha Raye. One of the running gags of the film involves Raye breaking mirrors every time she sees her reflection. It's also about a failing radio station where Fielding works which needs to put on a huge ratings winner to have any chance of continued operation.

Grace Fielding: Oh, I'm so sorry, Mr. Bellows. I didn't recognize you in this bad light.
S.B. Bellows: Ah, everybody seems to see me in a bad light.

The film may be viewed as a changing of the comic guard, made just a couple of years before Bob Hope became the top comic star for Paramount. For top billed Fields, this was his last film at Paramount. His best scenes are a sort of review of some of his best skits involving games of golf and pool, as well as traveling on a contraption that is a combination scooter and airplane--one of several similarities to Field's INTERNATIONAL HOUSE (1933). Hope's humor has always been largely verbal, and he really shines as the self-deprecating master of ceremonies, telling jokes so terrible that they are funny, such as the one about the guy who went to the dentist with only one dollar and got buck teeth.

Lord Droopy: Aren't you awake yet?
S.B. Bellows: Ohhhhh! I don't know. I haven't looked yet. Meet me down in the bar! We'll drink breakfast together.
Divorcee: I was married to him for eight months. I gave him the best years of my life!
S.B. Bellows: Never mind what I tell you to do. You do what I tell you!

Most of the action takes place at sea as S.B. Bellows shows off his new invention: an ocean liner that can turn radio signals into electricity and part the waves at 100 miles per hour. THE BIG BROADCAST OF 1938 primarily serves as a showcase for a variety of performers. A number of music and comedy acts appear in the ship's showroom, and some of the specialty performances seem dated. Along with Fields, who performs several classic pool and golf routines, Martha Raye, Dorothy Lamour, and Ben Blue add to the laughs. There is a powerful performance of "Ride of the Valkyries" by Metropolitan Opera singer Kirsten Flagstad in full Brunhilde armor and horned helmet. The Shep Fields number combines the big band performance with animated water drops credited to Warner Brothers' animation producer Leon Schlesinger. The movie is very similar to Broadway musicals of the 1920s and 30s, with a little vaudeville in it.

Martha Bellows: Gee, I'm so cute! I'll bet they put my picture on the front page.
Scoop McPhail: I'll never forget the last time you had your picture on the front page. Your mouth was continued on page two.
Scoop McPhail: (after being kissed by Martha) Aaaaahhhh! I've been kissed by a tunnel!

Sixth billed Bob Hope made his feature debut here, and he sings his future theme song "Thanks for the Memories", which Hope's character sings as a duet with former wife Cleo Fielding (Shirley Ross), accompanied by Shep Fields and his Orchestra. It is not performed as a funny novelty song, but as a romantic one. The song itself, which won an Oscar for Best Song, is a look at how distance reshapes the view of the past, giving a romantic glow to a relationship that may have been difficult at the time. It is more bittersweet than nostalgic, with the memories becoming progressively darker, coinciding with the disintegration of the marriage. More than just a love song, the lyrics are about how fragile relationships can be between two adults.

This was the final film under Fields' long-running Paramount contract, before he moved to Universal Studios to make his final series of films. A comedy and musical extravaganza set mostly aboard an ultra-modern luxury liner, it does not hold up quite as well as most of W.C. Fields' films. It is somewhat dull in spots, but several funny scenes compensate. Fields disliked THE BIG BROADCAST OF 1938, since his unique talents were ill-suited for Paramount's musical-comedy revue. The memorable moments in this 94 minute hodgepodge can be found during the first hour, highlighted by Field's surreal golf routine. Directed by Mitchell Leisen, the film is the last in a series of Big Broadcast movies that were variety show anthologies. THE BIG BROADCAST OF 1938 is without a doubt the best of the four movies. It is splendidly acted with an all star cast.

The cast also includes: Lynne Overman (Scoop McPhail), Ben Blue (Mike), Leif Erickson Bob Hayes), Patricia Wilder (Honey Chile), Grace Bradley (Grace Fielding), Rufe Davis (Turnkey), Lionel Pape (Lord Harry Droopy), Virginia Vale (Joan Fielding), Russell Hicks (Capt. Stafford), Kirsten Flagstad (Herself), Wilfrid Pelletier (Himself), Tito Guízar (Himself), Shep Fields (Himself), and many others. Gordon Jenkins, John Leipold, and George Parrish composed the original music, along with music and lyrics by Leo Robin and Ralph Rainger. Walter DeLeon, Francis Martin and Ken Englund wrote the screenplay from a story by Frederick Hazlitt Brennan that was adaptated by Howard Lindsay and Russel Crouse. Mitchell Leisen directed.

The currently available DVD contains two movies: The BIG BROADCAST OF 1938 and COLLEGE SWING (1938) with Burns and Allen, Martha Raye, and Bob Hope. Transfer is superb on both films. There are no DVD extras, but there is a trailer for COLLEGE SWING. This is a terrific buy with two classic comedies on one DVD.

Will Success Spoil Rock Hunter? (1957) * * *

Rockwell P. Hunter (Tony Randall), is a writer of TV commercials and low on the ladder at the company he works for: LaSalle, Raskin, Poole, and Crocket. He's planning to marry Jenny Wells (Betsy Drake), who's a secretary at the firm. He gets the inspiration of using Hollywood's reigning sexpot Rita Marlowe (Jayne Mansfield) to endorse "Stayput Lipstick" from his teenage niece April (Lili Gentle), who is the local president of the Rita Marlowe fan club. Marlowe is in fact spending some time in New York to recuperate from a bad affair with jungle-man actor Bobo Braniganski (Mickey Hargitay), with her companion Violet (Joan Blondell) in tow.

Rockwell Hunter: I'm not a failure. I'm the largest success there is. I'm an average guy. And all us average guys are successes. We run the works! Not the big guy behind the big desk.

Hunter goes to the apartment of the blonde bombshell to get her endorsement. In order for Marlowe to endorse the lipstick, however, Hunter has to pretend to be her boyfriend to make her real boyfriend Branigansky, the star of a TV Tarzan show, jealous. It will also reap publicity for her studio and career. She tells Bobo that Rockwell is the president of the firm. Bobo leaks the news of Marlowe's new romance to the tabloids and Rock Hunter is suddenly famous. He becomes a world-famous symbol of "Lover Doll". His life then takes a tailspin for the better and wilder. He is mobbed by bobbysocksers in the same way the Beatles would be seven years later. Women are crazy about him and he moves steadily up the ladder at work, becoming company president, only to find it is not what he really wants.

Rock Hunter: That's right Sweetie, I'm president of Rita Marlowe Productions, Incorporated, but Miss Marlowe is the titular head.
Rita Marlowe: I picked him up, I can pick him down.

However, things with Jenny become strained as he and Marlowe become an item, and it's clear that Marlowe genuinely falls in love with him. Hollywood's reigning sexpot reads "Peyton Place" by Grace Metaliousin in the bathtub. The book eventually became a feature film and a popular TV series that is claimed to be the forerunner of prime time soap operas, and that the buxom characters in the book were inspired by Mansfield. Meanwhile, Hudson comes home one night to find both his niece and his fiancée paralyzed from overdosing in bust-expanding exercises.

Violet: What you need is a drink.
Rock Hunter: And how!
Violet: Maybe two drinks! What'll it be?
Rock Hunter: Something simple. A bottle and a straw.

There is a half-time intermission, where Tony Randall speaks on the wonders of TV, which back then was a 21" screen with a "wonderful clean picture".
Hunter: Ladies and gentlemen, this break in our motion picture is made out of respect for the TV fans in our audience, who are accustomed to constant interruptions in their programs for messages from sponsors. We want all you TV fans to feel at home, and not forget the thrill you get, watching television on your big, 21-inch screens. Of course, the great thing about television is that it lets you see events live as they happen, like old movies from thirty years ago.

At the behest of his agency, Rock is forced to propose to Rita on a coast-to-coast TV show, which breaks the heart of his Jenny, but she takes him back in the end. Both Hunter and Marlowe are saved from a marriage neither one wants by the last-minute arrival of Rita's hometown boyfriend, George Schmidlap (Groucho Marx).

Rita Marlowe: George, how come you never tried to kiss me before?
George Schmidlap: I never could get close enough.
(turns his head to the camera and raises his eyebrows up and down)

Tony Randall and Jayne Mansfield have perhaps their best roles ever in WILL SUCCESS SPOIL ROCK HUNTER? This devastating film satirizes the advertising business, Hollywood, American culture, male-female relationships, television, and just about every other available target. It skewers its first victim immediately after the 20th Century Fox logo, where Tony Randall is seen playing the drums and cello from the Fox fanfare with Cinemascope extension. After Randall briefly explains the plot of the movie, the credits continue with some satiric commercials on products that obviously don't cut the mustard. Examples: "Pour yourself a full glass of that heavily-brewed, clear swamp water, Shelton's Beer", and "Wow Soap contains fallout, the exclusive patented ingredient".

Breakfast Food Demonstrator: Each little Crunchie contains energy, contains pep for your growing youngsters, builds strong legs so that when they're older they can stand the long waits in the unemployment lines.

Based on the successful Broadway play by George Axelrod, WILL SUCCESS SPOIL ROCK HUNTER? is an entertaining film reminiscent of a Doris Day-Rock Hudson film. The play ran from 1955-1956 with Jayne Mansfield recreated her starmaking stage role, for which she received a Tony. In this film adaptation of the comedy, it manages to pack a lot more punch. Marlowe's best takes: Seclusion and Catherine the Great. Mansfield's depiction of a Hollywood sex symbol is somewhat mannered but still relevant. Her love interest in the film, the neanderthalian Bobo Branigansky, is played by her real-life husband of the time, Mickey Hargitay, a former Mr. Universe. Jayne Mansfield's "Rita Marlowe" character is based on Marilyn Monroe during the 1950s and is quite funny. It's also a dig at her own image.

Tony Randall hogs the center of this show and grabs out wildly in any directon for a gag, be it popping his eyes at Miss Mansfield's chassis or smoking three pipes at one time. He even has a little sequence in which he steps out of the scene and calls for a "break" in the proceedings to accommodate the commercial-minded TV viewers in the audience. The jokes are not always in the best of taste. Joan Blondell as Miss Mansfield's pal and Henry Jones as muddle-headed huckster Henry Rufus are put through some shameless routines, and Betsy Drake and John Williams are directed to act only slightly less insane. In for a bit is Mickey Hargitay as Marlowe's jealous boy friend. He gives an imitation of a monkey-cluttered Tarzan.

Vibrating with comic energy, the Cinemascope screen is a playpen of joyous brassiness, compounded by superb performances. We may loathe the fact that the characters sell their souls, yet we can't help but admire the enthusiasm and creativity with which they do it, like the ravenous force with which Rock embraces his new stud persona or the slippery glibness his associate Henry Rufus employs in navigating Madison Avenue's polluted waters. Lured and trapped by consumerism, the characters yearn for a return to Nature. Hudson dreams of a chicken farm, while the company president Irving La Salle Jr. (John Williams) would rather be tending to roses than clients. The tragedy of WILL SUCCESS SPOIL ROCK HUNTER? is that the cartoon surfaces are closer to the entrapping gloss of Douglas Sirk than is first apparent. The ending is happy, yet the characters remain frozen in their rigid roles, becoming, as Jonathan Rosenbaum has pointed out, "abstract Brechtian commentators on their own dilemmas." Our laughter explodes only to dissipate.

The cast also includes: Lili Gentle (April Hunter), Georgia Carr (Calypso Number), Dick Whittinghill (TV Interviewer), Ann McCrea (Gladys), Alberto Morin (Frenchman), Louis Mercier (Frenchman), Robert Adler (Mailman), Majel Barrett (Hair Spray Ad), Phil Chambers (Mailman), Don Corey (Ed Sullivan voice), Richard Deems (Razor Demonstrator), Minta Durfee (Scrubwoman), Barbara Eden (Miss Carstairs), Larry Kerr (Mr. Ezzarus), Edith Leslie, Carmen Nisbet (Breakfast Food Demonstrator), Lida Piazza (Junior's Secretary), Patricia Powell (Receptionist), Benny Rubin (Theater Manager), Edith Russell (Scrubwoman), Jay Sayer (Reporter), Sherrill Terry (Annie), and Mack Williams (Hotel Doorman). Cyril J. Mockridge composed the original music. Frank Tashlin wrote the strory and screenplay based on George Axelrod's stage play. He used little more than the title and the character of Rita Marlowe from the play. Tashlin also produced and directed.

WILL SUCCESS SPOIL ROCK HUNTER? received a nomination for a Golden Globe for Best Motion Picture Actor: Musical/Comedy (Tony Randall) and a nomination for the Writers Guild of America, East WGA Award (Screen) for Best Written American Comedy (Frank Tashlin). French critics enjoyed this picture immensely, and Jean-Luc Godard had it on his 10-best list. In 2000, the film was selected for preservation in the United States National Film Registry by the Library of Congress as being "culturally, historically, or aesthetically significant". For some reason the video of this gem is not easy to find.

North by Northwest (1959) * * *

Roger Thornhill (Cary Grant), a middle-aged suave Madison Avenue advertising executive, is mistaken for a CIA agent named George Kaplan by a gang of spies. He is kidnapped by Valerian (Adam Williams) and Licht (Robert Ellenstein) and taken to the house of Lester Townsend (Philip Ober). There he is interrogated by a man he assumes to be Townsend, but who is really Phillip Vandamm (James Mason). When Thornhill repeatedly denies he is Kaplan, Vandamm becomes annoyed and orders his right-hand man Leonard (Martin Landau) to get rid of him.

Roger Thornhill: Now you listen to me, I'm an advertising man, not a red herring. I've got a job, a secretary, a mother, two ex-wives and several bartenders that depend upon me, and I don't intend to disappoint them all by getting myself "slightly" killed. And what the devil is all this about? Why was I brought here?
Phillip Vandamm: Games, must we?
Roger Thornhill: Not that I mind a slight case of abduction now and then, but I have tickets for the theater this evening, to a show I was looking forward to and I get, well, kind of unreasonable about things like that.
Phillip Vandamm: With such expert playacting, you make this very room a theater. Has anyone ever told you that you overplay your various roles rather severely, Mr. Kaplan?

Valerian and Licht try to stage a fatal car accident, but Thornhill, after a chase on a perilous road, is apprehended and charged with drunk driving. He is unable to get the police, the judge, or his mother (Jessie Royce Landis) to believe what happened to him, especially when a woman posing as Townsend's wife informs them that Townsend is a United Nations diplomat.

Thornhill and his mother go to Kaplan’s hotel room. Narrowly avoiding recapture by Valerian and Licht, Thornhill catches a taxi to the General Assembly building of the United Nations, where Townsend is due to deliver a speech. When he meets Townsend, Thornhill is surprised to find that he is not the man who interrogated him. When Thornhill questions him, Townsend states that his wife is dead. At that moment, Valerian throws a knife that strikes Townsend in the back. He falls forward, dead, into Thornhill's arms. Unthinkingly, Thornhill removes the knife, making it appear that he is the killer. A passing photographer captures the scene, forcing him to flee. Thornhill (Grant) is on the run, traveling incognito.

From Kaplan's itinerary, Thornhill knows he has a reservation at a Chicago hotel the next day. Thornhill goes to Grand Central Terminal and sneaks onto the 20th Century Limited train. On board, he meets Eve Kendall (Eva Marie Saint), who helps Thornhill evade policemen searching the train for him by hiding him twice: once in the overhead, fold-up bunk in her compartment. She asks about his personalized matchbooks with the initials "ROT". He says the O stands for nothing. Unbeknownst to Thornhill, Eve notifies Vandamm and Leonard, who are in another compartment.

Eve Kendall: What happened with your first two marriages?
Roger Thornhill: My wives divorced me.
Eve Kendall: Why?
Roger Thornhill: They said I led a dull life.
Eve Kendall: I tipped the steward five dollars to seat you here if you should come in.
Roger Thornhill: Is that a proposition?
Eve Kendall: I never discuss love on an empty stomach.
Roger Thornhill: You've already eaten!
Eve Kendall: But you haven't.

Arriving at Chicago's LaSalle Street Station, Thornhill borrows the uniform of one of the porters and carries Eve's luggage through the crowd. Although the police are alerted to his disguise, the sheer number of porters saves Thornhill. Meanwhile, Eve (who is Vandamm's lover) lies to Thornhill, telling him she has arranged a meeting with Kaplan. In an iconic sequence, Thornhill travels by bus to meet Kaplan at an isolated crossroads in the middle of a perfectly flat, open Indiana countryside. The only other person in sight is a man who is dropped off and waits at the opposite bus stop. Before boarding the next bus, he notes that a plane is "dusting crops where there ain't no crops." Without warning, the plane flies towards Thornhill and starts shooting at him. He is chased through a cornfield and dusted with pesticide. Finally, Thornhill steps in front of an oncoming gasoline tank truck, which stops barely in time. The plane crashes into it and explodes. When passing drivers stop to see what is going on, Thornhill steals a pickup truck.

Thornhill goes to Kaplan's hotel, but is surprised to learn that Kaplan had already checked out when Eve claimed to have spoken to him. Thornhill spots Eve in the lobby. He goes to her room, but she tells him to stay away from her. She allows him to stay and use the shower as she leaves. Using a pencil to reveal the indentations of a message on a notepad, Thornhill learns her destination: an art auction. There, he comes face to face once more with Vandamm, who purchases a pre-Columbian Tarascan statue. Thornhill tries to leave, only to find all exits covered by Vandamm's men. Thinking quickly, he starts placing nonsensical bids, so the police have to be called to remove him. Thornhill identifies himself as a wanted fugitive, but the officers are ordered to take him to Midway Airport where a gate for Northwest Airlines is seen--playing on the film's title.

Thornhill meets the Professor (Leo G. Carroll), a spymaster who is trying to stop Vandamm from smuggling microfilmed secrets out of the country. The Professor reveals that George Kaplan is a fiction created to distract Vandamm from the real government agent--Eve, whose life is now in danger because of Thornhill. In order to protect her, Thornhill agrees to help the Professor and his agency fool Vandamm.

Roger Thornhill: I don't like the games you play, Professor.
The Professor: War is hell, Mr. Thornhill. Even when it's a cold war.
Roger Thornhill: If you fellows can't whip the VanDamm's of this world without asking girls like her to bed down with them and probably never come back, perhaps you should lose a few cold wars.
The Professor: I'm afraid we're already doing that.

At the cafeteria at the base of Mount Rushmore, Thornhill (pretending to be George Kaplan) meets with Eve and Vandamm. He offers to allow Vandamm to leave the country unhindered in exchange for Eve. The deal is refused. In a staged struggle, Eve shoots Thornhill and flees. Vandamm and Leonard hastily depart, as the apparently critically wounded Thornhill is taken away by stretcher in a station wagon, accompanied by the Professor. When the makeshift ambulance reaches a secluded spot, Thornhill emerges unharmed to speak with Eve privately. He becomes highly agitated when he learns that she is using the "shooting" to get Vandamm to take her with him, so that she can gather further intelligence. Thornhill is knocked out. He wakes up in a locked hospital room, but escapes through a window.

Thornhill arrives at Vandamm’s mountainside home, scales the outside of the building, and slips inside undetected. He learns that the microfilm is in the Tarascan statue, then watches as Leonard convinces Vandamm that Eve is a government agent and the shooting was faked by firing the gun Eve used (filled with blanks) at him. Vandamm decides to throw Eve out of the plane once they are airborne. Thornhill manages to warn her by writing a note inside one of his distinctive matchbooks and dropping it where she will see it.

Just before she boards the plane, Eve escapes with the statue and joins Thornhill. Leonard and Valerian chase them across Mount Rushmore. In a struggle, Thornhill throws Valerian off Mount Rushmore to his death. When Eve slips and clings desperately to the mountainside, Thornhill grabs one of her hands, while precariously steadying himself with his other hand. He holds on for dear life to the facial features of the Presidents on Mount Rushmore (backlot sets were used). Leonard arrives and begins grinding his shoe on Thornhill's hand. They are saved by the timely arrival of the Professor and a police marksman, who kills Leonard. Vandamm is taken into custody.

The film cuts smoothly from Thornhill pulling Eve to safety on Mount Rushmore to him pulling her into an overhead train bunk, where they are spending their honeymoon. The final shot shows their train speeding into a tunnel--a famous bit of self-conscious Freudian symbolism reflecting Hitchcock's mischievous sense of humor. Alfred Hitchcock's cameo is a signature occurrence in most of his films. In NORTH BY NORTHWEST he can be seen missing a bus, two minutes into the film.

Cary Grant teams with director Alfred Hitchcock for the 4th and final time in this classic espionage caper. The master of suspense presents a 3000 mile chase across America. A strong candidate for the most entertaining and enjoyable movie ever made by a Hollywood studio, the film is positioned between the much heavier and more disturbing VERTIGO (1958) and the horror of PSYCHO (1960). NORTH BY NORTHWEST is Alfred Hitchcock at his most effervescent in a romantic comedy-thriller that also features one of Cary Grant's best performances. It's a classic Hitchcock "wrong man" scenario: Grant is Roger O. Thornhill (initials ROT), an advertising executive who is mistaken by enemy spies for a U.S. undercover agent named George Kaplan. There are the famous set pieces: the stabbing at the United Nations, the crop-duster plane attack in the cornfield, and the cliffhanger finale atop the stone faces of Mount Rushmore.

The cast also includes: Josephine Hutchinson (Mrs. Townsend), Adam Williams (Valerian), Edward Platt (Victor Larrabee), Robert Ellenstein (Licht), Les Tremayne (Auctioneer), Philip Coolidge (Dr. Cross), Patrick McVey (Sergeant Flamm), Ed Binns (Captain Junket), Ken Lynch (Charley), Stanley Adams (Lieutenant Harding), Paul Genge (Lieutenant), Madge Kennedy (Mrs. Finlay), Maggie (Roger's Secretary), Alexander Lockwood (Judge Anson B. Flynn), Nora Marlowe (Anna), Maudie Prickett (Elsie), Harry Seymour (Victor), Robert Shayne (Larry Wade), Frank Wilcox (Herman Weitner), Robert Williams (Patrolman Waggoner), Carleton Young (Fanning Nelson), and many others. Bernard Herrmann composed the original music. Ernest Lehman wrote the screenplay and Alfred Hitchcock directed.

The DVD extras includes a documentary presented by Eva Marie Saint, an audio commentary by screenwriter Ernest Lehman, two theatrical trailers , a TV Spot, and an isolated music audio track. The film itself is spruced up with a new digital transfer and remastered in Dolby 5.1 Audio and 1.66:1 widescreen anamorphic format. The only problem is it comes in a snap case like all Warners DVDs, not allowing a booklet with production notes. Many customers have complained about their DVD purchase being defective, especially the last half.

Author and journalist Nick Clooney praised Lehman's original story and sophisticated dialogue, calling the film "certainly Alfred Hitchcock's most stylish thriller, if not his best". The film is one of several Hitchcock movies with a film score by Bernard Herrmann and features a memorable opening title sequence by graphic designer Saul Bass. This film is generally cited as the first to feature extended use of kinetic typography in its opening credits. NORTH BY NORTHWEST was nominated for three Oscars and was selected for preservation in the United States National Film Registry by the Library of Congress as being "culturally, historically, or aesthetically significant".

Flash Gordon (1980) * * *

The voice of Emperor Ming the Merciless (Max Von Sydow) of planet Mongo indicates he will destroy Earth. Ming has been testing the Earth with unnatural disasters, and concludes it a threat to his rule.

Emperor Ming: Klytus, I'm bored. What play thing can you offer me today?
Klytus: An obscure body in the S-K System, your majesty. The inhabitants refer to it as the planet Earth.
Emperor Ming: Pathetic Earthlings. Hurling your bodies out into the void, without the slightest inkling of who or what is out here. If you had known anything about the true nature of the universe, anything at all, you would've hidden from it in terror.
Klytus: Most effective, Your Majesty. Will you destroy this Earth?
Emperor Ming: Later. I like to play with things a while before annihilation.

Sometime later on Earth, New York Jets football quarterback Flash Gordon (Sam J. Jones) boards a small plane when the "hot hail" begins. On board, he meets travel journalist Dale Arden (Melody Anderson) who is also flying back to NYC. After they take off, the disasters become progressively worse, and the pilots are sucked out of the cockpit. Flash and Dale rush to the cockpit and take control of the plane, and promptly crash land into the laboratory of Russian scientist Dr. Hans Zarkov (Topol). According to Dr. Zarkov's research, the disasters are being caused by an unknown physical source in space sending the moon out of orbit, with moon fragments plummeting to Earth, causing the hot hail. Zarkov has been secretly working on a rocket ship for several years to test his theory, and now intends to go to the coordinates for the source of the attacks. He launches the rocket ship with his unwilling passengers on-board and sets a course for the planet Mongo. Arriving on the totalitarian planet of Mongo, the three are promptly taken prisoner.

Flash, Dale and Zarkov are brought before Ming the Merciless. Ming orders Dale to be removed and prepared for his pleasure, but Flash openly defies Ming and picks a fight with his men, adapting his athletic skills from American football. Ming orders Zarkov into Klytus’ custody for reconditioning and orders Flash's execution. Following Flash's disposal, Princess Aura (Ornella Muti) and Ming’s Chief Surgeon, one of her numerous lovers, open Flash’s casket and resurrect him. Aura and Flash quickly retreat to Arboria, kingdom of Prince Barin (Timothy Dalton), another of Aura’s lovers.

Flash Gordon: I demand to see the governor! I can hardly breathe in this thing!
Klytus: Yes... you don't look well. I'm told you refused your final meal. The chef will be upset...
Flash Gordon: Tell 'em to go to hell!
Klytus: Maybe just as well. Gas works more quickly on an empty stomach.
Klytus: No one--but no one--dies in the Palace without a command from the Emperor.
Flash Gordon: This isn't happening, Dale. We're not here. It's just a bad dream.
Dale Arden: Oh, I agree completely. We'll wake up in any minute in Dock Harbor and have a laugh about this.
Flash Gordon: Only this time I won't just ask the maitre d' your name. I'll walk over and talk to you.
Dale Arden: You promise?
Flash Gordon: I promise. Cross my heart and hope to...

On the way to Arboria, Flash coerces Aura to teach him to use a telepathic communicator so that he can contact Dale and let her know he is still alive. Relieved, Dale informs Flash she is locked in Ming’s bedchamber. She later escapes and tells a reconditioned Zarkov that Flash is still alive. Dale and Zarkov subsequently escape, but they are quickly captured by Prince Vultan's (Brian Blessed) Hawkmen and taken to his kingdom, Sky City.

Klytus informs Ming of Flash’s resurrection and asks Ming’s authority to pursue the investigation. Ming agrees. Aura and Flash arrive at the forest moon Arboria. When Aura leaves, Prince Barin throws Flash into a cage and lowers him into a swamp. Barin decides to lure Flash into a trap by sending one of his Tree Men into the cage with a key to get out. Flash eventually tricks Barin and escapes into the swamp, and Barin soon follows in pursuit. He catches up with Flash, but before he can kill him, the two are taken prisoner by more of Vultan’s Hawkmen. Aura returns alone to Mingo City only to be taken prisoner and violently interrogated by Klytus and General Kala. They eventually get a full confession.

Klytus: Bring me... the bore worms!
Princess Aura: No! Not the bore worms!

Flash and Barin are taken to Prince Vultan’s kingdom, where Flash and Dale are briefly reunited. Klytus later arrives to arrest Barin and Zarkov for treason. But Flash and Barin double-team Klytus and kill him. In a panic, Vultan orders all the Hawkmen to evacuate, leaving Barin, Flash, Dale and Zarkov behind. Ming’s ship arrives shortly afterwards. Ming orders that only Barin, Zarkov and Dale are to be taken aboard his ship. Ming returns to his ship and gives the order to destroy Vultan’s kingdom with Flash still on it. But as the bolts of energy tear the place asunder, Flash finds one of the Hawkmen’s rocket cycles, and once again escapes death.

On Mongo, Dale is being prepared for her wedding to Ming in Mingo City, Flash approaching alone on the rocket cycle. General Kala (Mariangela Melato), orders weapons to open fire at him. Kala orders Ajax, an Imperial war rocket, to go after Flash and bring back his body. After a huge battle, the Hawkmen, heavily outnumbering Ajax’s crew, seize control of the rocket and, with Flash taking the helm, make their way toward Mingo City. In Mingo City, Princess Aura overpowers her guard and makes her way to the execution chamber, freeing Barin and Zarkov. Barin and Zarkov head for the control center, where General Kala orders all weapons to fire upon Ajax as it is out of its proper flight pattern, and also orders Mingo City’s protective lightning field to be charged up.

Zogi, the High Priest: Do you, Ming the Merciless, Ruler of the Universe, take this Earthling Dale Arden, to be your Empress of the Hour?
The Emperor Ming: Of the hour, yes.
Zogi, the High Priest: Do you promise to use her as you will?
The Emperor Ming: Certainly!
Zogi, the High Priest: Not to blast her into space?
(Ming glares at Zogi)
Zogi, the High Priest: Uh, until such time as you grow weary of her.
The Emperor Ming: I do.
Dale Arden: I do not!

In Mingo City, Ming and a defiant Dale’s wedding has just begun. The lightning field deactivates to reveal Ajax plummeting toward the temple. There is a frantic dash for safety as Ajax smashes into the sanctuary, and its lance-like bow impales Ming right through his midsection. The impact throws Flash clear of the rocket, dazed but uninjured. He grabs a dead guard’s sword and gives Ming an ultimatum: call off his attack on Earth or die. Ming aims his power ring at Flash, but it seems to have no effect. With his power fading, he aims his ring at himself and vanishes. Ming's robot servant declares that Flash has saved the Earth. Barin and Vultan and his Hawkmen arrive, Flash is again reunited with Dale, and a huge victory celebration ensues. Vultan announces to the multitude that Barin is the rightful heir to the now-vacant throne. The newly-appointed King Barin shows his gratitude to Flash, appoints Vultan as the new Army General, and decrees that everyone live together in peace.

The last scene focuses on Ming’s empty power ring, and a hand picking it up as the words "The End" fade onto the screen, followed by a question mark and Ming's evil laughter.

Heroic earthling Flash Gordon saves the world from the nefarious Ming the Merciless in this lavish, intentionally campy adaptation of the famous sci-fi comic strip. The story is as basic as space operas get: Ming has developed a plan to destroy the Earth, and Flash Gordon, Dale Arden, and Dr. Zarkov try to stop him. Along the way, Flash must battle Ming's goons and the temptations of a luscious space princess. The simplistic plot mainly serves as an excuse for spectacular sets and cartoonish action sequences, all set to a rock score by Queen. Certainly not a film to turn to for serious excitement, fine performances, or character development, FLASH GORDON has nevertheless developed an appreciative cult of fans. It is definitely much better than the Buster Crabbe 1930s movie serials in every way.

Based on the classic comic strip and its 1930s film serialization, this trashy classic is campy, adventurous, colorful and bold. Everything is bright and shiny and the sets are huge. At times the production design looks delightfully cheesy, but it's very expensive cheese. The legendary Max von Sydow appears to be having fun as the evil Ming the Merciless, while Ornella Muti as his daughter is the living embodiment of what attracts adolescent boys to comics in the first place. One of the most shamelessly entertaining movies ever made, this is a knowingly absurd sensory freak-out that intentionally uses a camp style similar to the 1960s TV series BATMAN in an attempt to appeal to fans of the original comics and serial films.

The cast also includes: John Osborne (Arborian Priest), Richard O'Brien (Fico), John Hallam (Luro), Philip Stone (Zogi, the High Priest), Suzanne Danielle (Serving Girl), William Hootkins (Munson), Bobbie Brown (Hedonia), Ted Carroll (Biro), Adrienne Kronenberg (Vultan's Daughter), Stanley Lebor (Mongon Doctor), John Morton (Airline Pilot), Burnell Tucker (Airline Co-Pilot), Robbie Coltrane (Man at Airfield), Peter Duncan (Young Treeman), Ken Sicklen (A Treeman), Tessa Hewitt (Hawk Woman), Venetia Spicer (Hawk Woman), Francis Mughan (Wounded Hawkman), Oliver MacGreevy (Klytus Observer No. 1), John Hollis (Klytus Observer No. 2), Paul Bentall (Klytus' Pilot), Leon Greene (Colonel of Battle Control Room), Graeme Crowther (Battle Room Controller), Tony Scannell (Ming's Officer), David Neal (Captain of Ming's Air Force), Bogdan Kominowski (Lieutenant of Ming's Air Force), George Harris (Prince Thun of Ardentia), Colin Taylor (King of Frigia), Doretta Dunkley (Queen of Frigia), Sally Nicholson (Queen of Azuria), and many others. Howard Blake composed the incidental music. Queen wrote and recorded the music score. Lorenzo Semple Jr. wrote the screenplay from Michael Allin's adaptation of characters created by Alex Raymond. Mike Hodges directed.

Rock band Queen's soundtrack is one of the highlights of the film. The music was composed by by Brian May, Roger Taylor, Freddie Mercury, John Deacon, and Howard Blake. Brian May wrote all the lyrics and Howard Blake arranged and conducted the orchestra, in some cases with Mercury and May. The title song "Flash's Theme" is first rate and relies on a blistering heavy electric guitar and a choir singing "Flash! Ahhhhh Savior of the universe". Unfortunately it also includes some very dated and primitive synthesizer patches played by Freddie Mercury. The other musical numbers are: In the Space Capsule, Ming's Theme, The Ring, Football Fight, In the Death Cell, Execution of Flash, The Kiss, Arboria, Escape from the Swamp, Flash to the Rescue, Vultan's Theme, Battle Theme. The Wedding March, Marriage of Dale and Ming, Crash Dive on Mingo City, Flash's Theme (Reprise), and The Hero. Queen released the soundtrack recording the same day John Lennon was assassinated.

The DVD quality is OK, but the picture transfer could have been better. This film has a lot of blue screen work, but surely it's not that grainy. The Savior of the Universe edition DVD lacks a lot of the extras found on the European Silver Anniversary Edition DVD. While you do get a remastered film with 2.35:1 anomorphic widescreen, 5.1 Dolby Surround and the movie trailer, it lacks the special features of the European DVD. That one has commentaries by director Mike Hodges and actor Brian Blessed, production stills, interviews and concept art. The SotU DVD has none of it.

What you do get is two featurettes. One is from Alex Ross and the other is called "Writing a Classic" by screenwriter Lorenzo Semple Jr. The remastering itself is definitely a big step up from the original DVD release, but still not perfect. The matte blocks are painfully noticeable on the spaceships early in the movie. There is however a whole lot less dirt and distortion compared to the first DVD release. Don't expect an incredible audio experience even if they remastered in 5.1 Dolby Surround. The SotU Edition of Flash Gordon is remastered and available in the US, but a real fan might only go for it if you can't play region 2 DVDs or if you want that Alex Ross featurette. The Silver Anniversary Edition is probably the better of the two, but both are fine.

Goldfinger (1964) * * *

In the pre-title sequence, secret agent James Bond (Sean Connery) destroys a Mexican drug lord's base with plastic explosives and defeats an assassin by electrocution. "Shocking! Positively shocking!" he says. The actual story begins in Miami Beach, Florida, with CIA agent Felix Leiter (Cec Linder) delivering a message to Bond from M to watch Auric Goldfinger (Gert Fröbe). Bond foils Goldfinger's cheating at gin rummy by distracting his employee, Jill Masterson (Shirley Eaton). After blackmailing Goldfinger into losing, Bond and Jill consummate their new relationship in Bond's hotel suite. Bond is knocked out by Goldfinger's Korean henchman Oddjob (Harold Sakata), who then covers Jill in gold paint, killing her by epidermal suffocation.

In London, Bond learns that his true mission is determining how Goldfinger transports gold internationally. He plays a high-stakes golf game with his adversary with a recovered bar of Nazi gold as the prize. Despite Goldfinger's cheating, Bond wins the match. Goldfinger warns Bond to stay out of his business by having Oddjob decapitate a statue by throwing his steel-rimmed top hat. Undeterred, Bond follows him to Switzerland, where he unintentionally foils an attempt by Jill's sister Tilly Masterson (Tania Mallet) to assassinate Goldfinger for the death of her sister Jill. Bond sneaks into a factory belonging to Goldfinger and discovers Goldfinger's Rolls-Royce being melted down. Its bodywork is fabricated from 18 carat gold, and if Goldfinger makes six such trips a year he must be making a fortune out of smuggling.

He overhears Goldfinger talking to a Red Chinese agent about "Operation Grand Slam". Leaving, he encounters Tilly as she is about to make a second attempt on Goldfinger's life, but accidentally trips an alarm. Bond attempts to escape using his Aston Martin DB5. During their escape, Oddjob breaks Tilly's neck with his hat. Bond is soon captured and Goldfinger has Bond tied to a table underneath an industrial laser, which slowly begins to slice the table in half. Bond then lies to Goldfinger that British Intelligence knows about Grand Slam, causing Goldfinger to spare Bond's life until he can determine how much the spy actually knows.

James Bond: Do you expect me to talk?
Auric Goldfinger: No, Mr. Bond. I expect you to die. There is nothing you can talk to me about that I don't already know.
James Bond: Well, you're forgetting one thing. If I fail to report, 008 replaces me.
Auric Goldfinger: I trust he will be more successful.
James Bond: Well, he knows what I know.
Auric Goldfinger: You know nothing, Mr. Bond.
James Bond: Operation Grand Slam, for instance.
Auric Goldfinger: Two words you may have overheard, which cannot have the slightest significance to you or anyone in your organization.
James Bond: Can you afford to take that chance?
Auric Goldfinger: (thinks for a moment, then orders the laser switched off) You are quite right, Mr. Bond. You are worth more to me alive.

Bond is transported by Goldfinger's private jet, flown by his personal pilot, Pussy Galore (Honor Blackman), to Goldfinger's Kentucky stud farm near Fort Knox, Kentucky.

Pussy Galore: We'll be landing in twenty minutes. Do you want to play it easy, or the hard way? And this isn't a tranquilizer gun.
James Bond: Now, Pussy, you know a lot more about planes than guns. That's a Smith and Wesson 45, and if you fire at me at this close range, the bullet will pass through me and the fuselage like a blowtorch through butter. The cabin will depressurize, and we'll both be sucked into outer space together. If that's how you want to enter the United States, you're welcome. As for me, I prefer the easy way.
Pussy Galore: That's very sensible.
James Bond: Besides, there's always so much going on around Mr. Goldfinger. It would be a shame not to accept his hospitality.
Pussy Galore: I'm sure he'll be happy to see you, too.
(touches the gun barrel to his chin)
Pussy Galore: You like close shaves, don't you?

Bond manages to escape and witnesses Goldfinger meeting with U.S. mafiosi, who have brought the materials he needs for Operation Grand Slam. Each of the hoodlums has provided something--nerve gas, manpower, a laser cutter--and they expect a hefty return on their investment. Instead, Goldfinger kills the hoodlums and reveals to Bond that he is being paid by the Red Chinese to detonate a nuclear device in Fort Knox in order to irradiate the entire gold supply of the USA, thereby rendering it useless for 58 years and greatly increasing the value of his own gold. This will also give the Chinese increased power following economic chaos in the West.

Auric Goldfinger: I prefer to call it an "atomic device". It's small, but particularly dirty.
James Bond: Cobalt and iodine?
Auric Goldfinger: Precisely.
James Bond: Well, if you explode it in Fort Knox, the... the entire gold supply of the United States would be radioactive for... fifty-seven years.
Auric Goldfinger: Fifty-eight, to be exact.
James Bond: I apologize, Goldfinger. It's an inspired deal! They get what they want, economic chaos in the West. And the value of your gold increases many times.
Auric Goldfinger: I conservatively estimate, ten times.
James Bond: Brilliant.

Goldfinger uses Pussy Galore's Flying Circus of female pilots to spread what he thinks is nerve gas across the Fort Knox military base. But Bond has managed to subvert Pussy Galore and get a message out to Felix Leiter: the nerve gas has been replaced with something harmless and the troops who fall over as if dead are actually faking. Goldfinger's people invade Fort Knox and make their way into the vault. Goldfinger has an atomic bomb wheeled into the gold reserve and chains Bond to it. The "dead" troops attack, and manage to disrupt Goldfinger's operation, but Goldfinger activates the bomb and escapes in the uniform of a US General, killing his Chinese liaison as he goes. Bond attempts to defuse the bomb, fighting off and killing Oddjob while he does so. In the end, an expert disarms the bomb.

With Fort Knox safe, the President of the United States invites Bond to the White House to thank him. Bond boards a military plane for Washington D.C., but Goldfinger has forced Pussy Galore to hijack it. Bond and Goldfinger struggle for the latter's gold-plated revolver and accidentally discharge it, shattering a window, and creating an explosive decompression of the aircraft, causing Goldfinger to get sucked out of the cabin. Bond rescues Galore, and they parachute safely from the aircraft before it crashes.

Pussy Galore: What happened? Where's Goldfinger?
James Bond: Playing his golden harp.

Though DR. NO (1962) and FROM RUSSIA WITH LOVE (1963) got the ball rolling, it was GOLDFINGER that started the 007 phenomenon, establishing an enduring cinematic formula. Dry as ice, dripping with deadpan witticisms, Sean Connery is without a doubt the definitive James Bond. No one but Connery can believably seduce women so effortlessly, kill with almost as much ease, and then pull another bottle of Dom Perignon 1953 out of the fridge. GOLDFINGER contains many of the most memorable scenes in the Bond series. From the "shocking" prologue to the exhilarating mid-air climax, it's a lightning-paced James Bond adventure that pits 007 against one of his most formidable opponents. GOLDFINGER is a thriller brimming with non-stop action, humor and excitement. With style, wit and wildly imaginative stunt sequences, this spy adventure ranks as one of the all-time great action films. It's an electrifying thrill ride that will captivate viewers from beginning to end.

GOLDFINGER is the third spy film in the James Bond series, and the third to star Sean Connery as the fictional MI6 agent James Bond. It is based on the novel of the same name by Ian Fleming. The film was the first official Bond blockbuster and made cinematic history by recouping its production costs in record-setting time, despite a budget equal to that of the two preceding films combined. It was also the first Bond film to use a pop star to sing the theme song during the titles, a hallmark that would follow for every Bond film since except ON HER MAJESTY'S SECRET SERVICE (1969). Shirley Bassey sings the theme song "Goldfinger", and she would go on to sing the theme songs for two other Bond films, DIAMONDS ARE FOREVER (1971) and MOONRAKER (1979).

The cast also includes: Bernard Lee (M), Martin Benson (Solo), Austin Willis (Simmons), Lois Maxwell (Moneypenny), Bill Nagy (Midnight), Michael Mellinger (Kisch), Peter Cranwell (Johnny), Nadja Regin (Bonita), Richard Vernon (Smithers), Burt Kwouk (Mr. Ling), Desmond Llewelyn (Q), Mai Ling (Mei-Lei), Varley Thomas (Swiss Gatekeeper), Margaret Nolan (Dink), John McLaren (Brigadier), Robert MacLeod (Atomic Specialist), Victor Brooks (Blacking), Alf Joint (Capungo), Gerry Duggan (Hawker), Peter Brace (South American Guard), Terence Brook (Security Officer at Airport), Anthony Chinn (Servant at Stud Farm), Marian Collins (Girlfriend of Goldfinger), Michael Collins (Auric Goldfinger's voice), Denis Cowles (Brunskill), Hal Galili (Mr. Strap), Caron Gardner (Flying Circus Pilot), Lesley Hill (Flying Circus Pilot), George Leech (Man in Bulletproof Vest at Q Branch), Garry Marshall (Hoodlum), Aleta Morrison (Flying Circus Pilot), Tricia Muller (Sydney), Lenny Rabin (American Gangster), Janette Rowsell (Chambermaid), Bob Simmons (James Bond in Gunbarrel Sequence), Les Tremayne (Radio Newsman voice), Michael G. Wilson (Soldier at Fort Knox), Maggie Wright (Air Squadron Leader), and Raymond Young (Sierra). John Barry composed the original music. Richard Maibaum and Paul Dehn wrote the screenplay adapted from Ian Fleming's novel. Guy Hamilton directed.

This film was both a critical and financial success. The movie's $3 million budget was recouped in two weeks, and it broke box office records in multiple countries around the world. GOLDFINGER went on to be included in the Guinness Book of World Records as the fastest grossing film of all time. The film grossed a total of $51,081,062 in the United States. It won an Oscar for Sound Editing and is a definite highpoint in the 007 series.

The DVD contains 2 very good commentary tracks, 2 documentaries, photos, radio interviews, trailers, etc. Picture quality is the same as the previously released DVD-version and looks very good, but the trained eye can notice some grit and dust in the print. The mono soundtrack is adequate, and the start-up motion-menu is high-tech and gets you in the Bond mood.

Journey to the Center of Time (1967) * *

Stanton (Scott Brady) is a hard-nosed gruff boss who is the head of a scientific research company he has taken over following the death of his benevolent father. His employees are scientists Mark Manning (Anthony Eisley), "Doc" Gordon (Abraham Sofaer), and Karen White (Gigi Perreau). The scene is a research center, where experimental time-travel is in its formative stages. Unless they prove that their time travel experiments can produce some results in 24 hours, their funding will be cut off.

A journey through time is rapidly set in motion. Desperate, they push their operating equipment past the level of safety and travel 5000 years into the future, with Stanton along as an accidental participant. The time travelers discover a totalitarian Earth under attack by alien laser beams. There, they confront a hostile band of extraterrestrials led by Vina (Poupée Gamin) who are looking for a planet to colonize and conquer the world. The aliens find no welcome on Earth, which is in the midst of a global war that threatens the human race. The group of four travelers chat with some aliens for a few minutes during a nuclear attack. Vina urges them to go back and warn humanity about the danger, then dies in an attack by humans. The time travelers retreat to their chamber and head back. On the way, they detect another time machine on a collision course. Gordon tries to communicate with them. When that fails, they fire at it, but their weapon is too weak. Stanton takes charge, boosts the power and destroys the other vessel.

However, all is still not well. They overshoot the present and end up in the distant past, in the age of dinosaurs. Their giant ruby, a key component of the machine, is destroyed, leaving them stranded. However, when they explore a nearby volcanic cave, they find it studded with all sorts of jewels, including rubies. Overcome by greed, Stanton grabs handfuls of the precious gems, returns to the time machine, replaces the ruby and takes off without the scientists. However, on his return trip, he encounters another traveler in time. He hears a radio broadcast, and it is from Gordon! He is racing towards the earlier version of the time machine. Then he is destroyed by a blast initiated by his earlier self.

Meanwhile, as the scientists leave the cave, Gordon stumbles and falls to his death in molten lava. The other two find the time machine gone. Then it mysteriously reappears. They board it and return to the day before their initial departure. But something is wrong. They find past versions of themselves living at a much slower time rate. The couple hasten back to the time machine to try to rectify the problem, but end up hopelessly lost in time and space. In the final scene, the machine is shown in space among the stars.

Also known as TIME WARP, this movie is one of those cheaply made sci-fi films whose minuscule budgets are matched only by an equally minuscule plot, direction, scripting, and acting. In this one, Stanton is your typically beefy industrialist whose only interest in the advancement of science is the financial bottom line. His unwillingness to provide further funding forces his scientists to prematurely zap ahead to the future in a time machine. Naturally, there is a mishap that lands then squarely in a nuclear war, whose own weirdly made-up leaders prance about for their few minutes of screen time. Stanton and his time traveling cohorts travel back to 1,000,000 BC where they meet dinosaurs. Apparently, the script writers did not know that dinosaurs died out when a comet crashed into Earth 65 million years ago.

At this point, whatever plot coherence there was dissolves into a misty mess of chintzy special effects whose only apparent purpose is to divert the viewer's attention from the huge plot holes. Further complicating matters is a series of potentially interesting temporal paradoxes that might have engaged the viewer if the script had incorporated them into a coherent plot. By the end, the viewer is asked to accept another silly science fiction ending of how it all began. The movie had potential and tried to say something important, but it is a classic bad sci-fi film. In fact, it is better than anything Ed Woods produced. Parts of the plot are actually interesting as the time travel space ship goes back and forth from the future to the past and ends up getting lost in time.

To the film's credit, things do move along fairly quickly as the film is pretty well paced. But everything is so incredibly cheap and cheesy looking. If you miss something the first time in the movie, don't worry, you will see it again because the film is padded with lots of annoying flashbacks of earlier scenes. If you like bad and cheap films loaded with scientific explanations that make no sense, you will enjoy this film. The DVD transfer looks better than the VHS version, but the visual quality is disappointing. There are no extras.

The cast also includes: Austin Green (Mr. Denning), Tracy Olsen (Susan), Andy Davis (Dave), Lyle Waggoner (Alien), Larry Evans, Jody Millhouse, and Monica Stevens. David L. Hewitt wrote the screenplay and directed.